By Phantom Troublemaker
Good evening, Phantomaniacs and welcome to basically the only Dragon Con post (aside from podcasts) I’ve been able to put together this year. And you’re about to see why.
The Dirty Dirty Con Con Game Game Show Show alone is enough of a project on its own and this year we’re in the biggest ballroom yet. What amounts to around an hour of (excellent filthy) entertainment requires dozens of hours of planning and hard work.
And then there are the regular panels.
And then there’s the whole new thing I’m doing this year – moderating Guest panels.
But I could not be more excited or feel more fulfilled. As my stress level and responsibilities have increased, so too has my enjoyment of Dragon Con. I loved the old days of just wandering around drunk, but I’m the kind of guy that thrives on having purpose. And no matter how silly you may think it sounds, entertaining people at the greatest convention in the world is a pretty fucking great purpose.
This year I am working for three different Tracks – American Sci-Fi Classics, Horror, and for the first time Puppetry – and I could not be more excited. All of those Directors are absolutely amazing people that work their asses off to make sure everyone at Dragon Con has a great time and I couldn’t be more proud to be a part of their plans.
Having said all of that, I’m still up to my eyeholes in work, so let’s get this thing started. You can find me in the Official Dragon Con app in the “Speakers” section as Phantom Troublemaker. My full schedule is in there, so you can add as much as you want to your own. Also, please remember to rate my panels in the app if you attend! Dragon Con takes that thing very seriously. That’s why this is the second year the game show has gotten a bigger room.
7 PM – DCW in Hyatt Centennial Ballroom – The greatest and best wrestling show that you will ever see. The very best independents from all over the country (and Canada!) wrestle purely for your – and their – entertainment. I’ll be calling the action all night. And if you can’t make it or are settling in to your room, you can catch DCW on Dragon Con TV!
10 PM – ESO party in Hyatt bar – I parted professional ways with ESO a couple of years ago, but I still love all of those people and don’t get to see any of them nearly enough. I’m excited to reconnect, plus it’s right upstairs from DCW!
11 PM – Marriott for Happy Nerd Year – I wouldn’t miss this for the world. Bring in the official start of Dragon Con with a horde of inebriated, costumed nerds. It’s the best.
1 PM – 1987 in Marriott M103-105 – Myself, Nicole Gould, Rebeccah Hunter, Noel Wood, Michael Bailey, and Gary Mitchel will discuss our favorite things from 1987! Come prepared to share your own favorites because you know I’ll be grabbing that mic and wandering into the audience. PLUS I have a surprise planned for this one. You don’t want to miss it.
2:30 PM – Sci-Fighters in Marriott M103-105 – A conversation happened the other day that transformed this already fun panel into a ridiculous experience that you do not want to miss. If you don’t know, Sci-Fighters is a tournament where the audience chooses sixteen (I think) competitors from specific corners of pop culture and then determine the victor. It’s like WWE’s old King of the Ring tournament. This year’s panel includes me, Ryan Cadaver (our Official Horrorologist), Rad Ranger, Joe Crowe, and Gary Mitchel! It’s gonna be redonkulous.
7 PM – Behind the Greasepaint of Bad Clowns in Westin Peachtree 1-2 – I will be moderating this panel with Guests Larry Hama, James A. Moore, Benjamin Radford, and the Chiodo brothers! It’s all about what went wrong with clowns, so don’t expect too much Killer Klowns talk. That one gets its own panel. I am encouraging clown cosplayers to show up, which may not be a super awesome idea.
8:30 PM – The Dark Crystal: Making the Mystics w/ Timothy Clarke in Marriott A704 – This is my first official panel as part of the Puppetry Track and I am SO FUCKING STOKED. Not just to be a part of such a wonderful Track, but because I finally get to meet Tim Clarke, who was one of the earliest guests on the Needless Things Podcast.
11:30 PM – Up Past Bedtime with Bean & Bear in Marriott A704 – (Just attending) One of my new favorites at Con. Bean and Bear are THE BEST.
1 PM – The Horror of Kane w/ Kane in Hyatt International North – I have many Dragon Con accomplishments of which I am proud, but the fact that this panel is my brainchild is way up there. Our pal Horror Track Director Derek Tatum agreed to put it in after I mentioned how cool it would be to have Kane talk about the See No Evil movies and about the more horror-oriented aspects of his wrestling career and it is happening. And I get to moderate.
2:30 PM – The Legacy of Friday the 13th in Westin Peachtree 1-2 - David P. Dreher, Mari Mancusi, Christopher G Moore, and lil’ ol’ me will be running down the history and lasting impact of one of America’s favorite sons – Jason Voorhees! And of course all of the other wacko killers from the Friday the 13th movies. And maybe even stuff about the TV show. I dunno. Show up and find out.
Midnight – The Dirty Dirty Con Con Game Game Show Show in Hyatt International South Ballroom – Don’t miss it. But get there early. There’s #moreballroom, but if I had to put money on it I’d say we’ll turn just as many people away this year as we have the last three.
11:30 AM – Wrestling Legends w/ Kane & Ricky Steamboat in Hilton Grand Salon – I’m not gonna lie – this sucks. 11:30 AM after the game show would’ve been rough when it started at 10, but after a midnight show I am going to be in SHIT SHAPE. There’s no way I’m missing moderating this panel, though. I already have my intros thought out and everything. And notecards. I’m using notecards this year.
1 PM – Puppets as Toys: Boglins & Sectaurs w/ Timothy Clarke in Marriott A704 – I will be talking live and in person to Tim Clarke about his two legendary 80s toy lines! Unless Kane murders me for being too hung over.
4 PM – A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors 30th Anniversary in Westin Peachtree 1-2 – My favorite movie from my favorite horror franchise. Plus, I think this is pretty much all of the Horror News Radio guys - Christopher G Moore, Doc Rotten, The Black Saint, Thomas Mariani – and they’re really cool. I enjoyed my panels with them last year.
10 PM – Santa Clarita Diet in Westin Peachtree 1-2 – This time on Sunday is usually a no-no for me, but I adore this show and am excited to discuss it. I think it’s also a pretty cool final official panel for the year.
Midnight – Late Night Puppet Slam – (Just attending) One of the best times you can have at Dragon Con. Much like DCW, the very best performers in their field come from all over to have fun and entertain us. Sometimes with fart and dick jokes. With puppets.
WAKE UP AND GTFO