31 Days of Halloween: The Phantom Channel Listings for October 24, 2016

Welcome to the fourth week of 31 Days of Halloween here on Needless Things! We have all kinds of stuff in store for you guys this year, ranging from creepy to kooky to mysteriously spooky to gory and unforgettably disgusting. We’ll look at spooky toys, horror movies, and all manner of things that go bump in the night.

Halloween is one of my favorite times of year and I tend to dive into appropriate subject matter wholeheartedly. One of the cornerstones of the season has always been television. Once October rolled around, I would start making schedules of all of the creepy stuff that would be on – from the classic Halloween specials to horror movies to special Halloween episodes of shows like Knight Rider and Roseanne. If I missed the Halloween episode of one of my shows, it would haunt me the rest of the year (pun intended)!

As soon as I could get my hands on the Sunday paper, I would pull out the TV listings (my dad wouldn’t spring for the actual TV Guide magazine and I don’t blame him one bit) and plan out my week. I didn’t have my own VCR until I was twelve, so there were sacrifices made. If The Howling and Invaders from Mars were coming on at the same time, I was going to miss one (Invaders from Mars, but mostly because that movie scared the crap out of me).

Last year I replaced my thoughts on SyFy’s October programming with some programming of my own. If I was going to complain about SyFy all month long (though I do love the channel and admire the fact that they program a full month of spooky stuff), I should be able to produce some television schedules of my own. Thus, The Phantom Channel was born!

Once a week I will post a “page” from my own personal TV Guide that will present twenty-four hours of Halloweeny movies, cartoons, and TV shows. Rather than being goofy or providing my usual commentary, I have done my best to mimic the dry style utilized in the TV listings magazine of my youth. I’ve added an extra challenge in this year, as I am going to attempt to work a theme into each day’s programming. Today’s theme:

VAMPIRES!

Morning

6:00 – Hotel Transylvania – Family – Adam Sandler, Selena Gomez

An intolerant Dracula deals with his willful daughter and a human in his hotel.(92 min.)

8:00 – Adventure Time “Evicted!/Marceline’s Closet” – Animated

Finn and Jake meet the Vampire Queen and learn about her home life. (22 min.)

8:30 - Danger Mouse "Duckula Meets Frankenstoat" - Animated
DM's most dangerous supernatural nemeses team up! (25 min.)

9:00 – Count Duckula “Bloodsucking Fruit Bats of the Lower Amazon” – Animated

Igor tricks the Count into a trip to the Amazon. (22 min.)

9:30 – Little Dracula “Midnight Madness” – Animated

The adventures of Dracula’s son. (22 min.)

10:00 – The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy “Dracula Must Die!/The Uninvited/Death of the Party" – Animated

Dracula has to deal with Billy and Mandy’s ridiculous nonsense. (28 min.)

10:30 – Scooby-Doo: Legend of the Vampire - Animated – Frank Welker, Casey Kasem

The gang investigate an Australian vampire at a music festival. (72 min.)

Afternoon

12:00 – Samson vs. The Vampire Women – Horror - Santo, Lorena Velázquez

Heroic luchador El Santo battles the undead in Mexico. (89 min.)

1:30 – Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant – Horror – John C. Reilly, Ken Watanabe

Two friends discover the world of the supernatural at a freak show. (109 min.)

3:30 – Drak Pack “Dred Goes Hollywood” – Animated

Dr. Dred releases a movie that makes Drak, Frankie, and Howler look bad. (25 min.)

4:00 – Tales from the Cryptkeeper “Fare Tonight" – Animated

Paranormal investigators make a shocking discovery. (22 min.)

4:30 – The Batman vs. Dracula – Animated

The lord of the vampires comes to Gotham City. (84 min.)

Evening

6:00 – Salem’s Lot – Horror – David Soul, James Mason

No one living in Salem’s Lot dared talk about the high, sweet, evil laughter of a child… and the sucking sounds… (184 min.)

9:30 – Tales from the Crypt “The Reluctant Vampire” – Horror

A vampire struggles to avoid his true nature. (24 min.)

10:00 – Shadow of the Vampire – Horror – Willem Dafoe, John Malkovich

The star of F.W. Murnau’s newest film is taking method acting to a whole new level. (109 min.)

12:00 – From Dusk Till Dawn – Horror – George Clooney, Harvey Keitel

After being kidnapped by two criminal brothers, the Fuller family learns that there are even worse things out there. (108 min.)

Late Night

2:00 – Near Dark – Horror – Lance Henriksen, Bill Paxton

A young man learns about vampires. The hard way. (95 min.)

4:00 – Taste the Blood of Dracula – Horror – Christopher Lee, Gwen Watford

A resurrected Dracula seeks bloody revenge.(95 min.)

That’s another day of Halloweeny programming in the can! I hope you decide to watch a couple of these selections and maybe even put together a viewing schedule of your own. Be sure to join the Needless Things Podcast Facebook Group and share your own awesome Halloween viewing schedules. We’d love to hear from you!

Also, follow PhantomTroublemaker on Instagram for the return of #monsteraday, where I feature a different monster toy every day, all month long!

Until next time, stay creepy!