It
is with a genuinely heavy heart that I tell you this will likely be
my last recap of wrestling action from the PCW Arena/Academy Theater
in Avondale Estates. It is entirely possible that this will be my
second-to-last recap of any
PCW action.
I
told you guys yesterday about PCW and how I feel about the company.
It’s tough to know it may change drastically or not even be around
soon. But we’ll jump off that bridge when we get to it. For now,
I’ve got one last night of hardcore, ass-kicking action and
surprises to talk about, so let’s do it!
It
was a small crew of Hooligans Friday night, which was surprising
because I thought this final outing (for us) would be a big one. But
it was me and the Grand Hoff and new recruit Terry Boy in the third
row. Let me tell you something, brother – wearing a mask over a
full beard sucks. Shit is itchy. But I have a costume in mind for
Halloween that requires as much beard as I can manage by then, so I
bore through it. I am such a brave soldier.
Me
and Terry Boy got there way early and talked to Harold Jay Taylor out
in the parking lot for a while. He makes me jealous with his nice
camera.
Johnny
Danger
Vs.
“The
Attraction” Hayden Young
Danger
has been on an absolute tear recently and it shows no signs of
stopping. Hayden Young is fast becoming my new favorite douchebag.
This
match had some history, as these two hooked it up a couple of months
ago. Things ended with Young brutalizing Danger and threatening him
with permanent harm until “Do or Die” Chip Day came out to make
the save; which actually set up Day and Young’s match at Sacred
Ground this Saturday. That last match featured Young playing around
with Danger and Danger showboating a bit more than he should have.
This time around both men were more serious.
Young
was determined to end Danger’s current win streak and laid down an
unrelenting assault on the smaller man. Young is always a solid
competitor, but I’m not sure I’ve seen him quite as focused as he
was last Friday.
At least, until Chip Day emerged from the locker
room to talk some smack. Danger took advantage of the distraction and
hit his opponent with a quick succession of moves, ending with his
finish which I’m sure has a cool name, but I don’t know what it
is. “Greetings From Tokyo”, maybe?
YOUR
WINNER – Johnny DANGAAAAAAAAA
After
the match a still disoriented Hayden Young made his way to the locker
room to a chorus of boos and jeers from the crowd.
Despite
the defeat I cannot wait to see The Attraction fight Chip Day
Saturday night. Both men are intense, skilled competitors and this is
actually my pick for Match of the Night. Don’t get me wrong – I
have no doubt we’re in for an amazing night of competition and that
Shane Marx and Mason are going to tear the house down, but I really
feel like Day and Young are going to sneak in and steal the show with
the best overall workrate match. By necessity Marx and Mason are
going to have to deal with a certain amount of entertainment value
that will add to the big match feel but detract from the technical
aspect of their clash.
El
Asesino Guy & Najasism
Vs.
De
La Vega & Supernatural
The
second match of the night also had significant stank on it, if you
will. Asesino and Supernatural will be fighting Grotesque and Devlin
Valek (I think) in a Destroy All Monsters Casket Match this Saturday while
Najasism and Vega will attempt to end their vicious feud in a Hair
Versus Hair match.
Asesino
showed up a few months ago at the behest of the Empire to rid the
promotion of “all the freaks”. So far he hasn’t had much
effect. I attribute this to the fact that A) PCW is comprised of
about 80% freaks, and B) I really, really
think Asesino is Shane Helms under a hood. Not really, but kind of.
But this quest of Asesino’s is what led to Saturday’s
sure-to-be-a-disastrophe match.
Naja
and De La Vega used to be pals. They’re both artsy-fartsy types and
they both have a certain amount of flair and showmanship to
compliment their not inconsiderable in-ring skills. But now they
fucking hate each other, which has led to a bunch of awesome. Naja
managed to pre-emptively shorten some of Vega’s locks a few weeks
ago after using a fucking stun gun(!) on him.
Vega
and Supernatural got things off to a hot start by dumping their
opponents outside the ring and beating the shit out of them for a
minute. They maintained control until Najasism landed a cheap shot on
Supernatural and tagged in just long enough for Vega to get involved,
at which point the painted warrior jumped back out of the match like
somebody lit his little ass on fire.
Asesino
regained the advantage, but solid tag work by De La Vega and the
Undead Luchador combined with Najasism’s unwillingness to face his
nemesis turned the tide.
Finally,
furies could no longer be contained and all four men were in the
ring, determined to destroy one another. The ref did his best to keep
things under control, but had no choice but to throw the match out.
It was CHAOS!
Asesino
and Supernatural fought their way to the back, leaving Najasism and
De La Vega in the ring, with the latter man unleashing a furious
torrent of rage onto his opponent. Vega finally hit his finish on
Najasism and left him senseless and face down on the mat. Seeing an
opportunity for a measure of revenge, Vega retrieved a pair of
scissors from under the ring – presumably stored there alongside
cookie sheets, folding chairs, ladders, tables, and maybe a
sledgehammer – and made the universal motion for, “I’m gonna
cut this fucker’s hair”.
And
he did.
I
have no doubt that the Destroy All Monsters Casket Match is going to
be a big ol’ pile of entertaining, but Najasism versus De La Vega
is sure to be intense. Looking at the two of them I find it hard to
believe either man is going to lose their signature hair, as both
men’s manes are a big part of their character. But this is Platinum
Championship Wrestling and PCW does not pull any bullshit
bait-and-switch.
Vs.
Mr.
Erik & “Dynamite Soul” Eric Walker & “The Revelation”
Shane Marx w/ Big Masked Guy, Jonathan Malick, and Rachel Freeman of
Empire
To
my knowledge none of these men are facing each other at Sacred
Ground. This match was just booked because it was a kickass match.
The Bullets are consistently PCW’s hottest babyfaces and every day
is Chip Day. As far as the heels go, they’re all just despicable.
This
match was preceded by a lot of shit-talking, then Mr. Erik – who
may or may not be referred to as “Showtime” Erik Jones now –
stepped in so that Jon and Trey could whoop his ass for a while.
Obviously the much-improved heel got sick of that real quick and
tagged in Dynamite Soul, who evened things up a little bit. Chip Day
got tagged in for Team PCW, but Walker managed to drag him into the
Empire corner and tag in that vicious villain Shane Marx. Day got in
a couple of moves, but then Marx dodged a running kick and took
control of the action.
From
that point on both teams took their turns handing out beatdowns and
the action was fairly balanced. But finally, through the powers of
teamwork and good sportsmanship Team PCW got the upper hand. The
Bullets hit a Marion Barry on Mr. Erik and Chip Day lined up for what
might have been a Shining Wizard…
If
Hayden Young hadn’t run in from behind and clobbered the fuck out
of the Honorary Hooligan.
And
then, while Team Empire kept the Bullets occupied outside the ring,
The Attraction laid waste to his former tag team partner. I haven’t
particularly taken note of it before, but Hayden Young uses a
particularly brutal finisher – what I would describe as an implant
snapmare. It starts like this:
And
is pretty sick. Young performed this move on a defenseless Day three
times and then once more, egged on by the crowd’s deafening boos.
YOUR
WINNER – The Washington Bullets & Chip Motherfucking Day by DQ
After
the match the Empire stood outside the ring and applauded Hayden
Young’s despicable actions. The rest of PCW emptied out of the
locker room – far too late to do any good – to see to a
near-unconscious Day. For some reason PCW Medical Technician Doctor
Mei Lei was nowhere in evidence. Team PCW helped Day limp his way to
the back as the crowd chanted, “Do
or Die!”
I
have to apologize to Tommy Daniels here, which is something I never
imagined I would do. He has a new name that is extraordinarily
Italian and I can’t remember what it was. I think it began with a
“P”. Puzzichelli? Pastraminetti? I dunno. Somebody help me out
here.
Tommy
came out after Chip Day was hauled off to ask the crowd why he didn’t
have a singles match at Sacred Ground Chapter Three. I think pretty
much everybody in attendance agreed it was because he has all the
personality of a damp lasagna noodle, but Tommy was still miffed.
Actually,
I tried to do you all a favor by glossing over something, but I’m
feeling a little mean after having to be mostly complimentary for the
first half of this recap.
You
see, Tommy came out and asked something along the lines of, “You
want to know what I’m wondering?” and the crowd all said, “NO.”
Tommy
got all frustrated and tried again to the same response and it was
pretty funny. He stomped around a little and fumed and tried again.
Naturally the crowd responded the same way.
But
then he did it, like, twelve more times. I think that was too many.
Some may not agree. And to Tommy’s credit, the crowd kept playing
as long as he kept going, so I really blame them.
Finally,
Tommy got to the fucking point and said he was pissed he didn’t
have a singles match at Sacred Ground. He said a spot in the Platinum
Royal wouldn’t cut it. No, sir. He wanted his own showcase. He
challenged anybody in the back to come out and prove he didn’t
deserve such a match. Surprisingly, the very best entrance theme of
all time started playing.
Magic
Mangina…
And
Marvelous Marko Polo appeared from the back with Crown Jewel Records’
Quasi Mandisco and Miss Nina Monet in tow.
Here’s
the thing about Marko Polo – we all really want to cheer him.
Despite his arrogant manner, his large entourage, Nina Monet’s
abrasive sassiness, and Quasi’s ridiculous white jeans; there’s
just something that makes you want to like Polo.
So
when he comes out to shut Tommy Daniels (or Pepperoni or whatever)
up, the crowd goes nuts.
Tommy
Daniels
Vs.
Marvelous
Marko Polo w/ Quasi Mandisco & Nina Monet
The
Marvelous One started off strong, but ate a vicious super kick when
he tried to hit a double axe handle from either the middle or top
rope. From that point on Tommy the Italian dominated.
I
want to take this opportunity to mention that this match also has
some history. The first time I saw Tommy Daniels compete was at one
of the Masquerade shows and it was against Marko Polo. It was back
when I was still doing my parody-style recaps and I claimed that
Daniels won the match by throwing a midget disguised as his infant
son at Polo. Later on when I met Polo he asked me about this and I
had to explain my goofy recaps. That was probably the first time I
thought about doing marginally more serious recaps.
The
reason I bring this up now is that I had to go to the bathroom during
this match and ended up missing the end.
YOUR
WINNER – I bet Marko Polo won
When
I got back the ring was cleared and a stable of Empire goons was on
the way out. Jacob Ashworth and Corey Hollis entered the ring while
Screamin’ Marty Freeman stayed outside with Big Masked Guy. Marty
introduced Hollis and Ashworth as Empire’s newest tag team
sensation and the men that would dominate at Sacred Ground Chapter
Three.
I
can’t remember if Freeman laid out a challenge or if the match was
already signed, but he said that Hollis was here to prove himself in
singles action. His opponent emerged from the locker room and it was
Wow.
Corey
Hollis w/ Jacob Ashworth, Big Masked Guy, and Screamin’ Marty
Freeman of Empire
Vs.
The
Sensational Jay Fury
Listening
to the ring announcer announce Jay Fury is always a treat. The man is
full of adjectives.
Fury
started things off by just working the fuck out of Hollis’ arm. It
was looking like the smaller man might not even get off the ground,
but then he hit a couple of moves and got Fury in the corner.
What
happened next is that Geter ran out of the back and started beating
the shit out of Jacob Ashworth, then Brian Blaze ran out to assault
Corey Hollis because We Are 3 is not going to tolerate all these
jackasses coming out and claiming something about being the best tag
team.
But
because of this one picture, it looks like Geter and Blaze dropped
from the rafters of the PCW Arena, surprising both Fury and Hollis:
Anyway,
Hollis and Ashworth and Geter and Blaze all fought their way to the
back, leaving Jay Fury in the ring to insist that the referee raise
his hand in victory. Okay, I guess?
And
we got a Jay Fury outro as well!
Then
Screamin’ Marty Freeman came out with Big Masked Guy and… Murder
One!?!
Vs.
Sylar
Cross
Murder
One took control initially and laid down a pretty good whoopin’.
Experience looked to be winning out over youthful enthusiasm. But
then Cross hit his boiling point and unleashed the fury, hitting
Murder One with a clothesline, what might have been an axe bomber, a
BIG leg drop, and a running crossbody for the 1-2-3!
This
was a fun, by-the-numbers match. Cross is hitting all the right notes
with his new babyface run and it was cool getting to see Murder One
in PCW.
Speaking
of cool, the next match was one of the best surprises I have seen. I
would never have imagined we’d get something like this on a Friday
ngith in Avondale Estates…
Vs.
Casey
Kincaid
Okay,
now I know there might be some folks out there who don’t get the
significance of that pairing. Not everybody knows what kind of
athletes Yehi and Kincaid are. I feel bad for you guys, but I feel
worse for anybody that saw that match-up and went, “Oh, shit
– I can’t believe I missed that!”
Because
you did miss it and man, it was great.
Casey
Kincaid is a PCW veteran who has battled everybody and as Phantom had
some amazing matches; not only with other veterans, but with
up-and-comers.
Fred
Yehi reminds me very much of Chris Benoit. I know we’re not
supposed to use that name, but the circumstances of his death do not
change the fact that the Crippler was one of the greatest wrestlers
ever to enter the ring. Yehi’s style, presence, and natural
aptitude brought Benoit to mind the very first time I saw him compete
and still do whenever he steps into the ring.
I
wanted to see every second and every move of this match, so I did
something I don’t really ever do – I put away my camera and went
up to the front row.
It
means you guys don’t get a recap, but too bad. I wanted to sit back
and enjoy this one as a pure fan and I did.
It
was pure intensity from the opening bell with both men struggling for
dominance. This was one of those special matches that you just don’t
get to see all that often regardless of how technically-oriented a
promotion may be or claim to be. You could feel the competitive
spirit radiating out of the ring the entire time, with every grapple,
hold, and movement holding significance that outweighed even the
outcome of the match itself. It was a mat classic.
And
then the ten minute time limit ran out, with no winner.
I
have no problem with this at all. I am actually a huge fan of time
limit draws. It is an excellent way to get two competitors over and
let the audience decide who they think the winner was. This finish
used to happen all the time and is barely used nowadays for some
reason.
YOUR
WINNER – My personal feeling was that if the match had been allowed
to continue – which the crowd wanted and demonstrated vocally –
Casey Kincaid would have emerged victorious. As good as Yehi is, I
think Kincaid is hungry. Casey Kincaid seems to feel like his time is
now and I agree one hundred percent. With the Phantom gimmick long
gone and DamNation disbanded, I think there’s nothing holding
Kincaid back from achieving his destiny. Especially once the
PCW/Empire conflict is resolved at Sacred Ground. No matter which
side wins, there will be no more faction drama to distract from what
should be Kincaid’s ultimate goal – whichever Championship
remains.
And
God willing we’ll see this match again with that very title at
stake. Maybe at Sacred Ground Chapter Four.
Man,
that would have made a great close for this recap, but we
still have more show!
Not
only that, the Yehi/Kincaid match has more story because as soon as
the bell rang Jay Fury returned to the ring. He said that Kincaid and
Yehi were both awesome and would have an amazing match at Sacred
Ground Chapter Three (which I did not know was happening). But Fury
wants in on that match.
The
crowd went nuts. I went nuts. But then when I thought about it, I was
a little torn. Yeah, of course I want to see these three go at it.
But I am not a huge fan of three-way matches. Don’t; get me wrong –
of course this match will be awesome. But I’d rather see any
combination of these guys in a one-on-one.
But
both Kincaid and Yehi accepted, so we officially have Fred Yehi
versus Casey Kincaid versus Jay fury at Sacred Ground Saturday night.
Pandora
came out to the ring next to tell us all what we already know –
that she is the toughest broad in pro wrestling. She mentioned that
she will be competing in a four-way match at Sacred Ground against
Nina Monet, Aisha Sunshine (who I don’t believe has competed in a
few months), and Christi Whiplash. I’m not familiar with Whiplash,
but the crowd went a little nuts and somebody behind me yelled, “Holy
shit! When did that happen?” so I guess she’s a big deal.
And
then Aisha Sunshine jumped Pandora from behind and started beating
the crap out of her. Nina Monet isn’t gonna let those two yaks hog
the spotlight, so she ran out from the back and joined Aisha in the
beatdown. The two sinister sisters took turns whipping Pandora with
belts, then wrapped the straps around her neck and choked her out.
The
PCW locker room emptied to put an end to the slaughter and Monet and
Sunshine made their escapes.
Pandora
stood on her own, but was barely able to make her way back to the
locker room. The Crown Jewels, meanwhile, were quite proud of Miss
Monet:
Your
Platinum Championship Wrestling Main Event!
Jacob
Ashworth w/ Corey Hollis, Big Masked Guy, & The Freemans
Vs.
Demigod
Mason w/ The Witness
For
the PCW Championship
I
really like watching these two fight. Mason is a very tight, skilled
competitor and Ashworth makes a great opponent because he is such a
big, skilled man he seems like a genuine threat to the champ. It
gives Mason a good opportunity to show what a badass he is and
Ashworth gets a run at a title. The only flaw in logic here is that
Ashworth’s nickname is “The Nihilist” so he really shouldn’t
care about winning any titles. Or matches, for that matter.
Ashworth
came out of the gate strong, knocking the champ off his feet and
hitting a big fallaway slam. But Mason quickly recovered and hit a
move I’m a little surprised I haven’t seen before – a snapmare
from the top rope:
From
there he had the clear advantage, which probably explains why the
Empire showed up to ruin the party.
The
Witness was able to protect his charge until PCW reinforcements
arrived, and then things got CRAZY-GO-NUTS!
After
a reasonable amount of brawling, things calmed down with Big Masked
Guy and The Witness toe-to-toe with their factions behind them,
including Stephen Platinum and all of the Empire’s weasely managers
– Rachel, Marty, and Jonathan.
Rachel
Freeman got on the mic and cut a blistering promo about how Stephen
Platinum’s time was done and it was disgusting that the Empire had
even had to put up with his presence for so long after they gained
control. After Saturday night they would finally be rid of the taint
of “Platinum”. And why the heck was Sacred Ground a PCW show,
anyway?
Platinum
took the mic at that point and said a bunch of things involving the
word fuck. He then said fine, next week (this Friday) at the FINAL
Academy Theater show there would be a match between The Witness and
Big Masked Guy.
He
explained that The Witness used to be a fan that just wanted to be
involved (something I can identify with). He asked if he could be
Mason’s bodyguard – nothing more. But that the guy has come to be
an important part of PCW if not an outright representation of what
PCW is.
So
is The Witness wins the match Friday night, Sacred Ground is held
under the Platinum Championship Wrestling banner. If Big Masked Guy
wins, it becomes an Empire event.
More
smack was talked as PCW left the ring, and Empire gloated
triumphantly (if perhaps prematurely) from the ring as the crowd
booed the ever-loving shit out of them.
Then
Corey told me he stole Murder One’s vest:
That
was a heck of a night, but Saturday promises to be quite literally
the biggest night Platinum Championship Wrestling has ever seen.
Check out my Facebook album for a ton more pictures.
Check out my Facebook album for a ton more pictures.
i absolutely love you reviews.
ReplyDeleteThanks, man! Hopefully I'll be able to keep doing them for a long time to come.
DeleteSweet recap as always...by the way, my finishing maneuver is known as "Godzilla's Revenge". But Greetings From Tokyo wasn't a bad guess!
ReplyDeleteGreat Review
ReplyDelete