Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Toy Review – Masters of the Universe Classics Demo Man By Mattel

Okay, so I got all the vitriol in my system over the Demo Man delay out yesterday.

Well, I didn’t get it out. I shared it. It’s still firmly intact deep in my toy-collecting soul. But I feel better. Better enough that I can do an intro that is my usual brand of space-filling nonsense.

Monday, January 30, 2012

Matty Sucks Part 2: Suckage Rides Again!

It is about fucking time, Matty.

I’ve been waiting well over a month to shit all over you for the debacle that was your December Club Eternia experience. Uh, I mean, waiting a month for my figures to arrive.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Vintage Troublemaker: Phantom Troublemaker Goes to Hollywood (sort of): The Director’s Cut

This is old, but I was shocked to discover I hadn't posted it here. It originally appeared on my MySpace blog, then was re-edited and put up on MC4TR.

It's the story of me being an extra in Rob Zombie's Halloween 2, a movie that I do not actually appear in. I think it's because I was too fat at the time. You can't let extras top three bills, you know?

Note: That poster has been to two Dragon*Cons and the Mayhem Music Festival and will also be attending the Days of the Dead horror convention in Atlanta this March. It's signed by Malcolm McDowell, Danielle Harris, and Rob Motherfucking Zombie.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Toy Review – Classic Doctor Who: Enemies of the Third Doctor By Underground Toys

I am in a great position to enjoy this set of Doctor Who figures.

There are a ton of characters and creatures from Classic Doctor Who that I am not familiar with. While I have seen every TV story featuring the eighth, ninth, tenth, and eleventh Doctors; I have seen far less of the first seven. Until recently I had the most exposure to Tom Baker (who I had gotten to watch many Saturday nights when I was a wee lad) and just a bit to the following three Doctors. But the first three were hardly known to me. The only times I had seen them were when they showed up for special episodes like The Five Doctors.

Monday, January 23, 2012

Toy Review – Classic Doctor Who: Image of the Fendahl By Underground Toys

Hot damn! It’s a Doctor Who set without a figure of the Doctor!

I wouldn’t have said Image of the Fendahl was a very high-profile Doctor Who story, but I’m going purely off of the ones that stand out in my mind from when I was a kid. And it does have a lot of things to recommend it – an evil skull, a Cthulu-looking monster, a cult, wacky villagers, and Louise Jameson - sweet, sweet Louise Jameson - as Leela.

Thursday, January 19, 2012

New Horror Toy Revolution!

I got the idea for this one while I was writing the Freddy review the other day. I’m always somewhat hesitant to do a whole post about something that’s nevere going to happen.

So, there are only three formats where modern horror toys are lacking – 8” scale clothed figures and super-articulated figures in either the 3 ¾” or 6” scale. Naturally, I have fantastic ideas for all three.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Toy Review – DC Universe Classics: Dove By Mattel

So Dawn Granger actually replaced Don Hall as Dove back in the eighties, but I don’t know much of anything about that, so we’ll pick up at the end of Blackest Night.

Monday, January 16, 2012

Toy Review – DC Universe Classics: Hawk By Mattel

Hawk and Dove are the only two figures I cared about from the final wave of DC Universe Classics.

As much as I enjoyed Blackest Night, I have totally lost interest in Black and White Lanterns, so that Flash was out. I already have a Green Arrow that I’m pretty happy with and I have no particular affinity for Roy Harper, so I’ll pass on those. I might actually buy a Professor Zoom or Reverse Flash or Eobard Thawne or whatever the heck they’re calling him. But I want to see it first. That’s going to have to be one great head sculpt and paint job to get my fifteen bucks.

But I like the characters of Hawk and Dove a lot.

Friday, January 13, 2012

Friday the 13th: Thirteen Jason Voorheeses

I really wanted to do something special for Friday the 13th, but instead you get this. I drew all of these over the course of one night. I would say they get weirder the later it got, but they're all fairly strange.

I wish I could draw better.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Toy Review – Masters of the Universe Classics Beast Man By Mattel

Beast Man was one of the few Masters of the Universe figures I had when I was a kid. He might have actually been the first one I got – I’m not sure. Either way, I hated him.

I’m going to be honest and maybe offend some folks here, but Beast Man was a very stupid-looking toy. He is the only instance I can think of where orange and blue do not look cool together and his face is dumb. He was an idiot on the cartoon, too. I mean, everybody on the cartoon was an idiot except maybe Man-At-Arms, but you couldn’t tell when you were eight. But even an ignorant, nose-picking eight-year-old could tell Beast Man was a grade-A moron.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Toy Review – Freddy Krueger from A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master By NECA

I haven’t bought a whole lot of horror toys in the last few years.

They used to be a staple of my collection and while I still have a large amount of wall space in the Man Room dedicated to more vampires, demons, and slashers than you could shake a machete at; I just don’t buy them all that often. Partially because I have toys of almost every major horror icon I could want, but also because the licenses just aren’t as prevalent as they were in the early part of the last decade. Horror isn’t big business right now.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

The Airplane Design

I have been so fucking busy lately that I can’t seem to find the time to do a whole heck of a lot of writing. So today I’m taking the cheap way out.

Monday, January 9, 2012

Toy Review – Classic Doctor Who: Keeper of Traken Box Set By Underground Toys

This is honestly kind of a weird set.

If I were to put together a set of figures from Tom Baker’s penultimate Doctor Who story, I can think of several different combinations that don’t resemble this one at all. I get wanting to put the Doctor in every set. I wouldn’t do it, but I understand the logic. My ideal “Keeper of Traken” set (basing it off of the three figures and two accessories in this one) would have included the Melkur, Nyssa, and Adric. Three things we don’t already have. Not sure what I would have done for accessories. Maybe flowers for Melkur.

Friday, January 6, 2012

Top 31 Ginger Action Figures

Here for no particular reason are the Top Thirty-One Ginger Action Figures. These are rated mostly on how much I like them, but also based on their accuracy to the source material and how good an action figure they actually are.

Since there are no American Horror Story figures, Moira the Ghost Maid is not Number One.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

2011’s Worst Stuff

I always start a “Worst Of” list and I never end up posting it. I’m going to post this one even if it only has five things on it. Not because I have some sort of insane moral conviction that I need to balance out my happy “Best Of” list, but because I am running dangerously low on posts as I prepare to go on vacation.

As a side note, I have had a wonderful idea for a new time-saving product.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Toy Review – Masters of the Universe Classics Wind Raider By Mattel

This may well be the centerpiece of Mattel’s 2011 Masters of the Universe Classics offerings. We, the fans, have been waiting since the line’s inception to see any of the vehicles from the vintage toys updated.

We were teased a couple of years ago with a mock-up/prototype of the Battle Ram that the Four Horsemen created for San Diego Comic Con. It looked fantastic and made everybody feel pretty sure that not only would we be getting a vehicle soon, but that it would probably be a Battle Ram. Reasonable, right? But nothing about MattyCollector is reasonable (just look at the Star Sisters), so of course we got the Wind Raider to finish off 2011.

Monday, January 2, 2012

How I Spent My New Year’s Eve (On December 29th)

Happy New Year, nerds!

It’s New Year’s Eve as I sit at work producing this latest missive. You might think I’m bummed about that and you’d be abso-fucking-lutely correct. But I am not as bummed as I might otherwise be because I had my own personal New Year’s Eve at the Clermont Lounge with the Casket Creatures, the Tone Deaf Pig-Dogs, Kill, Baby... Kill, and a few of the DCW Hooligans. It was great.

The event capped off seven days of awesome, by which I mean seven days of being with my family and not at work.