Monday, October 31, 2011

31 Days of Halloween: The Big Finale!

Scareglow – “Wow! Hey you guys – thanks for showing up! I’ve got your cos… uh, your overalls right here. I hope you’re ready for some serious undercover work.”

Friday, October 28, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 20: Spooky Toy Review – Universal Monsters Retro Cloth: Mummy By Diamond Select Toys

I think my love of the Mummy as a character comes from Hammer’s Curse of the Mummy’s Tomb being one of the first legit horror movies to scare the shit out of me as a child. Another positive is that I have never seen an Egyptian Mummy movie that I haven’t liked (and yes, I specified “Egyptian” so I could ignore that wretched third Brendan Frasier Mummy movie), something that can’t be said about vampires, werewolves and the reanimated corpses.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 19: Spooky Toy Review – Universal Monsters Retro Cloth: Dracula By Diamond Select Toys

So here’s the third of the currently available Universal Monsters from this line.
Dracula as a character is not my favorite. As a matter of fact, he comes in a solid fourth when compared against the other three characters in the Retro Cloth line. Further down when you add in other Universal Monsters. Now, if we’re talking about Hammer Dracula that’s a whole different story. That guy is a bad motherfucker.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 18: Chambers of Horror

Note: I am going to do my best to not mention a certain other Halloween attraction in this review. I believe each event should be judged on its own merits and not compared to anything else.
Also, I am prepared to accept that any gripes I have may be the result of us being there on a Thursday night when business is not at its peak. I don’t feel like that’s any excuse when you’re charging the same to regular patrons Thursday night as you are any other night, but I am willing to believe that’s the reason behind certain things.

Platinum Championship Wrestling 10/20/2011

Pre-Ramble – 10/19/2011
I cannot possibly express how excited I am right now.
Yesterday on Facebook Shane Morton (Silver Scream Spook Show, Atlanta Zombie Apocalypse, Super X-13, Gargantua) announced that he and Stephen Platinum were holding Monster Championship Wrestling on Saturday. As the name implies, this venture involves monsters wrestling.
Clearly I had to try and get involved.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 17: Horrifyingly Slack Excuse For A Post! Aaaaaaah!

Sorry, guys. I just couldn't get anything done last night due to an extreme overload of work and the fact that I am still worn out after our crazy weekend.
So here are a bunch of pictures I've used for past Halloween posts (the very last one's Linnea Quigley and it may be a bit unclear but it's totally NSFW):

Monday, October 24, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 16: Spooky Toy Review – Universal Monsters Retro Cloth: Frankenstein By Diamond Select Toys

It’s Franken-time!
Okay, let’s just put that on the list of things I’m never going to say again; along with “That’s Phantom-tastic!” and “Word up!”.
If I was only going to buy one of these new Retro Cloth figures, Frankenstein’s Monster was a safe bet to be it. Out of the four characters currently available – this one, the Mummy, Wolf Man, and Dracula – the Mummy is actually my favorite, but let’s be honest. He’s not very visually exciting. Frankenstein’s Monster, on the other hand, is one of the most iconic monsters in all of horror.

Friday, October 21, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 15: Spooky Toy Review – Universal Monsters Retro Cloth: The Wolf Man By Diamond Select Toys

You might be wondering why the Ghostbusters all got lumped together into one review and the Universal Monsters each get their own.
It’s because the Universal Monsters require a lot more unique parts than the Ghostbusters and also because I realized I could get four days worth of posts by separating the classic creatures. But mostly the parts thing. I promise.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 14: Spooky Vintage Toy Review – Bela Lugosi as Dracula By Flatt World Toys

There was a time when this was the holy grail of toy collecting. Right around the big collecting boom of the late 90’s, the height of ToyFare magazine’s power; this guy was released at a price that was unheard of for a small, domestic action figure. Dracula was well received, but not well enough to spawn a full line from fledgling Flatt World Toys.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 13: Horrific Movie Review – Spooky Buddies

Note: I want you all to know that I love you people, and that this is the kind of torture I put myself through to create enough material for the month and break things up a little bit so 31 Days of Halloween is not all toy reviews.
Before we go any further I have to point out that my son is three years old and I cannot wholly endorse his taste in anything. While he has taken in Episodes IV-VI of Star Wars in basically a single sitting and walked out of The Phantom Menace, he likes Dora the Explorer and that awful fucking Gumball show. So he’s got a good foundation, but clearly there is a lot left to learn.
I’m just saying don’t hold it against him that he enjoyed Spooky Buddies. I’m trying not to.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 12: Creepy Item Review – Boba Fett Candy Server By Rubies

This thing isn’t creepy or spooky at all. But it is a Halloween item, so it gets a review here.
I don’t actually remember when it was offered through Previews and I really don’t remember ordering it, but since it’s Boba Fett I feel reasonably certain that I did. I do remember seeing the item listed and it turned out a bit different from what I was expecting. Not necessarily in a bad way, just different.

Monday, October 17, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 11 - Hot Dudes 2: Revenge of Hot Dudes

Being strapped for ideas for this month of Halloweeny goodness led me to consider past subject matter. And since “Dragon*Con 2011 – Hot Dudes” got me more response than any ten other articles I’ve written, I thought it would be a wise decision to do some more Hot Dudes.
Uh… I mean write another Hot Dudes post.
This time around it’s the same kind of thing – sarcasm/Since I am an expert in what ladies and gay fellows would want in a man\end sarcasm, I’m going to take a look at the guys who have featured in horror movies over the years and figure out who makes those panties moistest.

Friday, October 14, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 10

We started a new Halloween tradition last year of visiting this place called Randy’s Pumpkin Patch. It’s a neat little seasonal place off of Highway 29 that sells overpriced Halloween decorations, overpriced tickets to inflatable jump things, overpriced pony rides, overpriced bunnies, and of course overpriced pumpkins(!).
I realize that’s a lot of overpricing, but it really is a fun place and not a bad way to help get your Halloween on.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 9: Spooky Toy Review – Masters of the Universe Classics: Hurricane Hordak By Mattel

I definitely prefer the Evil Horde to any of the other Masters of the Universe factions.
I think Matty made a smart decision by releasing this Hordak variant in the same month as Leech. That way nobody could bitch about getting another Hordak instead of a new Horde member. Granted, they did anyway, but now it’s easier to ignore them.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 8: Atlanta Zombie Apocalypse 2011

Note: Due to the nature of the Atlanta Zombie Apocalypse I don’t want to give a whole heck of a lot of detail about where, when, or why you’ll have the shit scared out of you. Just know that you will and often.
I hope you guys can get on board with more of a narrative than an actual review because that’s how I can get away with being a little more vague and, hopefully, entertaining.
Also, if you don’t want any spoilers you shouldn’t read this. Just go do it. It’s awesome.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 7: Horrifying Movie Review - Zombie Strippers

Note: I did not have time to finish my Atlanta Zombie Apocalypse review the way I wanted to. Not only was I way too busy to complete it, I also had a great idea for the post that is going to take me a night at home to complete. I promise it’ll be worth the wait.
So in the meantime, here’s a decent review of a shitty movie.
This was actually written months ago. I sat on it this long with the intention of taking pictures during a second viewing to go along with the review. As time passed, the idea of watching this movie again became less and less appealing. So – sorry, but no pictures for you.

I finally watched this movie on Netflix the other night after the wife kept insisting that I needed to. It stars Jenna Jameson as a Zombie Stripper, Tito Ortiz as a cowardly bouncer, Robert Englund in what might be his best performance as somebody who isn’t a roasted pedophile and a bunch of absolutely terrible “actors”. I thought Zombie Strippers featured a bunch of porn stars, but porn stars are better actors than the cast of this movie. I mean, seriously – when Robert Englund appears to be slumming you know you’re dealing with a whole new level of suck.

Monday, October 10, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 6: Spooky Toy Review – Retro Action The Real Ghostbusters By Mattel

Mattel’s Ghostbusters products have been a mixed bag; a source of both joy and frustration to collectors.

The standard 6” figures sort of fall into the “I suppose this is the best we’re going to get” category. They aren’t bad by any means, but they sure could be a heck of a lot better. Especially for twenty bucks apiece. As a matter of fact, the 6” line has been so underwhelming that Matty had to cancel the subscription service for 2012; releasing only the four figures that were already announced for next year. That’s what happens when you release the same four characters over and over again, hold back on accessories with the stated intent of making people buy figures they don’t want, and shuffle releases around constantly. People lose interest. And faith.

Friday, October 7, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 5

(That's the view from my office as I post this and add pictures.Neighbors love me.)
The Troublemakers ventured forth to investigate the local Halloween stores and their offerings on Monday. It’s a thing we’ll end up doing several times over the next month. See, I’ve made the decision to keep things at a Scooby-Doo level of scary this year. Lil’ Troublemaker is old enough to get how awful some of your more grotesque Halloween things are (zombies, Freddy Krueger, The Worst Witch), but not old enough to get that it’s all fake and fun. There’s also the fact that there will be a bunch of kids at his birthday party and I don’t want to freak anybody out. Which is why we’re not inviting his great grandmother (I kid, I kid!).

Thursday, October 6, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 4: Top Ten Stupid Horror Movies

And I mean that with the utmost respect. But these are ten movies that – while I love them – are just fucking retarded.
Whether it’s the acting, directing, story or just the whole thing is a fucking mess (see #1); these movies all posses at least one dominating factor that makes them absolute garbage. Some of them are awesome because of that, others are just awful. But they’re all dumb.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

31 Days of Halloween Day 3: Creepy Toy Review – Masters of the Universe Classics: Megator By Mattel

I’m not entirely sure who Megator is – other than being a giant – and I as usual skipped reading the bio on the box. I think he and Tytus might have come out in France or something?
Regardless of my familiarity with the character, I was still excited about the toy when I first saw it. Big, green giants are right up my alley. And I was doubly excited when I saw the alternate zombie head. It looked like something out of an EC comic and that is definitely my thing.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

31 Days of Halloween - Day 2: Tucker & Dale vs Evil

Spoilers might follow. I have noticed that I’ve been avoiding writing movie reviews lately and I think it’s because I’m sick of reining myself in so as not to give anything away. My natural writing style is to just let my brain spill forth onto the paper (or screen or whatever) and it is very unnatural for me to have to edit myself. So from here on out when I review a movie I’m just going to do my normal thing and talk about whatever I want to talk about.
Skip to the bottom if you just want my recommendation and a score.
This movie has been on the periphery of my awareness for quite some time now. I haven’t followed it like I did Your Highness or like I am Knights of Badassdom, but I knew it was happening.
Tucker & Dale stars Alan Tudyk and Tyler Labine; which pretty much explains my interest. Everybody loves Tudyk and Labine is a favorite of mine for his work on Reaper (I’m still bummed that got cancelled). The last time I was made aware of the movie was when Labine was on Attack of the Show and mentioned it while promoting something else. It refreshed my memory at the time, but nothing else came about and I kind of forgot.

Monday, October 3, 2011

Welcome to 31 Days of Halloween! - Day 1

31 Days of Halloween” is technically a big fat lie since I only post Monday through Friday. But “21 Days of Halloween” just doesn’t sound as spooooky. And I am aware that the SyFy channel uses the same name for their annual offering of Halloween-oriented programming, but I was using it before they even existed. Well, before “SyFy” existed anyway.
For the past three years I have spent the month of October torturing myself by trying to come up with a month’s worth of Halloween-oriented content. While does a much better job of it, I hope maybe I can entertain a fraction as well as that guy. As for this first entry, I have absolutely nothing to talk about other than wanting to start the month of creepy posts off.